


Five Ways To Tell When Jason Todd Is Drunk Off His Ass

by RichardGraysonPercyJackson



Series: Drunk Confessions With Dick Grayson and Jason Todd [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Big Brother Dick Grayson, Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, Good Big Brother Dick Grayson, Truth or Dare, jason is drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2020-06-26 02:26:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19758709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RichardGraysonPercyJackson/pseuds/RichardGraysonPercyJackson
Summary: One of Jason’s rules for himself is that he absolutely cannot get drunk around anyone except Roy and Kori.Kori, at least, will make sure he doesn’t get behind the wheel or try to jump off a roof.Roy will just mock him.





	Five Ways To Tell When Jason Todd Is Drunk Off His Ass

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to write this as a little short on Tumblr but then it got to long so here you go

Five Ways To Tell When Jason Todd Is Drunk Off His Ass.

1: He gets hot (which results in Roy trying to wrestle him down to prevent Jason from ripping off his pants in the middle of a bar)

2: His Gotham accent slips through (something Roy has planned to forever mock him about)

3: He cries a  _ lot _

4: His topics of choice alternate between Dick Grayson, his mom, and how he’s ‘ _ fine, Roy, just gimme another drink. I can handle it’ _

5: He  _ loves  _ truth or dare.

One of Jason’s rules for himself is that he absolutely cannot get drunk around anyone except Roy and Kori. Kori, at least, will make sure he doesn’t get behind the wheel or try to jump off a roof.

Roy will just mock him.

Sometimes though, they slipped up and didn’t watch Jason which meant he ended up walking away. This time, he had somehow wandered from a sleazy bar in Crime Alley Gotham all the way into the Bludhaven Police Department.

“Dickie!” Jason cried as he stumbled in, wandering through shocked and confused police officers until he arrived at his older brother’s desk.

“Jason?” Dick asked, frowning. “What are you doing here?”

“You,” Jason declared, words slurred. “Look like shit. When’d ya sleep last?”

“Last night,” Dick said slowly, standing and looking his brother over. “Are you okay?”

“Fantastic,” Jason replied. “Hey! Wanna play a game?”

Dick didn’t get to reply before his partner Amy walked up, one hand not so subtly on her gun.

“You know hm, Grayson?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Dick replied.

“He’s my brother!” Jason cried, slinging an arm around Dick’s arm and nearly throwing himself off the desk had Dick and Amy not rushed to steady him. “Hey. You Dickie’s new girlfriend?”

Dick’s face turned scarlet. “I’m so sorry,” he told Amy quietly “I think he’s drunk. I don’t know what’s gotten into him.”

“You two must have a good relationship.”

“The best!” Jason slurred. “Dickie, I wanna go home now.”

“Go on, take him home,” Amy said. “Take the rest of the night off too.”

“Amy-”

“Paid leave, Grayson,” she said. “And get some rest. You need it.”

“Told’ya,” Jason drawled as Dick helped him stagger to his feet and out towards the parking lot where his car was waiting. “Can we play a game now?”

“Sure Jason,” Dick replied, still trying to figure out wht the fuck his brother was doing here of all places. He climbed into the car and made sure both their seatbelts were buckled. “What did you want to play?”

“Truth or dare,” Jason declared. “You go first.”

After a brief moment of silence in which Dick stared at Jason, wondering if the other had hit his head on the way over, the acrobat cleared his throat and pulled into traffic.

“Uh, alright,” he began. “Truth or dare? I-I guess?”

“Truth,” Jason said, sliding down in the seat and getting comfortable. “Your car smells nice.”

“Truth, okay,” Dick agreed, ignoring the last statement. “What are you doing here, I guess.”

“Wanted to come see you,” Jason replied. His mood had suddenly changed to the point that he sounded like he was going to cry. Dick chanced a glance at him when they met a red light and was surprised to find his brother’s eyes glassy. “I missed you.”

“You hate me,” Dick said quietly.

“Nah,” Jason drawled. “Just a pretend, Dickie. I really like you. Like, fuck, wish I could get a decent fuckin’ job.” he grumbled as he shifted. “Tired o’ bein’ Red Hood.” he glanced over at Dick. “Don’ tell sober me.” he sniffled. “‘M jealous o’ you.”

Dick had no idea what the fuck he was supposed to say in reply to that so he only nodded. They drove on, the silence punctuated by Jason’s little sniffles, until the younger of the two perked up again.

“My turn!” he declared. As though he hadn’t been on the brink of crying for the last ten minutes. “Truth or dare?”

Dick was driving so he couldn’t exactly pick dare without endangering them both. 

“Truth,” he decided after pretending to think.

“Tell me somethin’ you’ve never tol’ me b’fore,” Jason requested.

Dick pressed his lips together. There were a  _ lot  _ of things he could tell Jason. But he needed to pick something that wouldn’t make Sober Jason shoot him in the morning.

So he took a deep breath. “The reason I wasn’t at your funeral,” he said softly. “Was because I didn’t know.”

He didn’t need to look to know Jason was frowning. “Know what?” 

Dick looked over to give him a sad smile. “I didn’t know you died. I didn’t know anything until a week after the funeral and it wasn’t even Bruce who told me. It was the epitaph in the cave and even then, I had to get Roy to answer.”

Jason didn’t say anything and Dick wasn’t surprised.

Not another word was exchanged.

…………..

“Okay, you can crash on my bed for the night,” Dick said as they entered the apartment and he locked the door behind them. “I don’t mind the-”

He didn’t get a chance to finish the sentence because as he turned around, Jason flung himself into DIck, pulling him in for a tight hug.

Dick blinked, taking a few moments to process before carefully wrapping his arms around Jason’s much broader frame.

That was when he felt the younger  _ sobbing  _ into his neck.

“I’m so sorry!” Jason wailed, tightening his grip on Dick until the acrobat was sure his ribs were bruised. “I’m so sorry ‘m so mean t’ you! ‘M jus’ so jealous and you’re B’s favorite and you’re my favorite brother and-”

“Jason, hey,” Dick murmured, rubbing Jason’s back. “It’s okay. It’s alright.”

“No it’s not!” Jason sobbed. “All I do is hurt you.”

“And I forgive you,” Dick soothed. “Listen, Jay, I need you to answer a few questions okay?”

“Mkay.”

“Were you drinking alone tonight?”

“No,” Jason replied miserably. “Went with Roy and Kori.”

“And where are thy?”

“Dunno,” Jason replied. “Gotham.”

“Did you drive here?”

“Walked.”

Holy shit. “Alright. Come on. Let’s get you too bed.”

Jason sniffled loudly but let Dick help him back to the bedroom, not even caring as he stripped to crawl ass naked into Dick’s bed.

“Lay with me?” he mumbled.

“Until you fall asleep,” Dick replied.

Jason was out like a rock ten seconds later.

……………

The first thing Jason noticed when he woke up was the fucking massive migraine. The second thing was that he was in a strange bed with no clothes on.

“Shit,” he muttered as he sat up, snagging the painkillers he found on the bedside table and downing them with one go. He found his clothes on the top of a nearby dresser and pulled them on, already prepared to apologize.

“Good morning.”

“Dick?” Jason asked, eyes wide. “Fuck, we didn’t fuck, did we?”

Dick laughed. “No, Jason, we didn’t fuck.”

Jason narrowed his eyes. “What  _ did  _ happen?” he asked as Dick brought him a mug off coffee.

“You walked all the way from Gotham to my door,” Dick replied. “Stripped as soon as you got in and promptly passed out on my bed.”

“And that’s it?” Jason asked.

“That’s it,” Dick confirmed.

“We didn’t talk? Tell each other dirty little secrets?”

Dick’s smile was strained but Hungover Jason had poor observational skills so he missed it.

“Your secrets are safe with you, Jay,” Dick replied.

“Good,” Jason said, nodding. “Now feed me. I’m starving.”

………..

“Hey Kori.”

“Hello Richard,” Kori greeted. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, just...you and Roy went out drinking with Jason last night right?”

“Yes, that’s right,” Kori replied. “He slipped away but he got back fine so-”

“Yeah, I know, I drove him back,” Dick replied, cutting her off. “Because he’d walked all the way to the BPD to  _ see  _ me.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah  _ oh _ .” Dick knew he wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping himself calm so he took a slow breath. “Just...keep an eye on him for me next time, alright? And maybe limit him to a few drinks instead of how many he had last night.”

“Of course,” Kori confirmed. “Was he okay?”

“He didn’t get hurt  _ somehow _ ,” Dick replied. “Just...just don’t let that happen again, okay? I can’t…I can’t lose him again.”

“It won’t happen again, Dick, you have my word.”

…………….

Drunk Jason showed up at Dick’s door two weeks later.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know your thoughts!!


End file.
